More Selections From “Ten”

by Emilio Pérez Miguel on January 28, 2011

ten emilio perez miguel

Although “Ten” was the second book I published, it was actually written before the first one that did come out, “Once”. Both titles were published by Rumbo Editorial – “Once” in 2009, and “Ten” in 2010.

When interviewed in the media, I am invariably asked why did I publish them out of order.

The simple answer is that “Ten” is a book that has no palliatives, whereas “Once” (owing to its free structure and multiple endings) is a book from which something positive can effectively be construed.

I think that the two compositions I have included below exemplify that. They come from the two final sections of the book, “Vicinity” and “Distance”. These turn “Ten” into “an exorcism and an outright damnation”, as I say in the preface.

I think these two compositions pay a clear debt to albums like “The Who By Numbers”, “All The Best Cowboys Have Chinese Eyes” and also an album I greatly like from an artist that (generally) I’m not  really that fond of: “Blood On The Tracks” by Bob Dylan.

So, without further preambles… “I Hurt You” and “You Lie”.

I Hurt You

I leave you because I don’t want to desert you
I decompose you because I love you intact
I say nothing because I love how you react –
I hurt you because I didn’t want to hurt you

I lead you because I don’t want to divert you
I tug at your heart because I love you unmoved
I love the absence of all you never removed –
I hurt you because I didn’t want to hurt you

And you longed for morn-like brilliance when I longed for the night
And I longed for occurrences when you longed for respite

I prod you because I don’t want to convert you
I motivate you because I love you inert
I love the deep silence whenever you assert –
I hurt you because I didn’t want to hurt you

I leave you because I don’t want to desert you
I decompose you because I love you intact
I say nothing because I love how you react –
I hurt you because I didn’t want to hurt you

You Lie

You lie splendidly and I love to believe you
And I tell the truth for I want to deceive you
I’ll bear the brunt of this retardation
You lie surreptitiously and I observe it
I have nothing left and I want to preserve it
Then I ponder on this situation

And I don’t know if I should love it or hate it
All that I know is that you facilitate it

You lie without reason and I justify it
I can see where this leads – still I ratify it
I like to savour this degradation
You lie brazenly and I congratulate you
I watch in awe and I want to emulate you
Then I ponder on this situation

And I’m uncertain if I exaggerate it
All that I know is that you facilitate it

And you lie and I never want to reproach you
But I feel the friction, and when I approach you
I lack all valour and I lack all tact
And you lie in the dirt for that’s where you belong
And I’m right beside you as I vomit this song
And it comes tumbling like a cataract

And I wonder if someone can terminate it
Cancel, void, nullify or invalidate it
Displace, banish, extinguish or dissipate it
All that I know is that you facilitate it

{ 1 comment… read it below or add one }

dawn October 9, 2011 at 1:33 pm

“i hurt you” is very moving, emilio. these are both beautifully written.

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